I dug out my old journal the other day just for fun. I decided to ask Halee and Austin if they wanted me to read some of it to them. It's a journal from when I was 17, almost 18. I was pretty surprised when they got all excited and wanted to. One week later and we're already half way through my entire journal...and Christian and Connor are listening in too. It's so cool to them because it talks of a time before Chris was in my life, and then when we met, and all the trials we faced. We're getting close to when he proposes, but haven't made it quite that far yet. They laughed pretty hard when I came to a part where Chris and I had met for the first time. I wrote in my journal that night and I said "Chris is a very nice guy, that will one day make some woman very happy, it's just not going to be me." Thank goodness I saw the error in my ways, because he's brought me more joy than I ever could have hoped for. I noticed in my journal that I was so close to Heavenly father. I had the strongest testimony. I still have a strong testimony, but realized that I need to do more to strengthen it. I get so caught up in my busy life, that I forget to take the time to do things that will help me grow. I never thought I could find an example in myself, but I have. I am going to try to be the person I used to be. Weird, I know. I also never thought my children could love hearing from me at that young tender age of teenage hood, but they beg me every night to read to them. I know now that journals really do serve a purpose. My children are learning that I went through tough teenage stuff just like them, and by leaning on a loving father in heaven, I got through it. It's pretty amazing.
